Seasons change, and so do we
As the weather gets colder and days shorter, our surroundings are not the only things changing.
Just like the leaves, we are prone to change. Photo by: (Marina Meireles//The Underground)
It’s nothing new that changing seasons brings new realities to our daily lives. We feel the seasons change in the clocks, the weather, the fall of leaves and their eventual bloom. So if the change of season has all this impact on everything that we know, how can we expect to not change ourselves with the constant changes around us?
Firstly, it’s important that we note that the personal changes I’m addressing here are not meant to disqualify the behavioural changes faced by people affected by seasonal depression or seasonal affective disorder (SAD). Your mental health matters, and if at any point you feel like you may be experiencing some of these symptoms, CAMH has multiple resources to provide guidance throughout the seasons. Changes in our behaviour can be seen as normal, but they shouldn't impact the way we live our lives and our well-being.
As Post Malone sings in Circles “Seasons change and our love went cold.” As fall came, I found myself reflecting a lot more about the kind of relationships I had in my life. And that is a phenomenon that has been happening to me since I moved to Canada, three years ago. Maybe seeing the leaves change and take away the colour summer carried from spring was the breaking point to change something about my life as well. And as I see the trees dry out, I can’t help but wonder what winter will bring into perspective.
A study by the University of British Columbia (UBC) found that people deal with crises in a better way during spring and fall, than during summer and winter. It was just what I needed to hear to confirm what I already had in mind: everything is more intense in extreme weather. For example, summer will bring the most intense emotions of the year, it’s like we are alive again.
Cities and communities come alive with so much to do and so many opportunities to socialize compared to the winter months. In Toronto, all the patios are open, there are baseball games happening nearly every day, and the city is welcoming tourists from all over the world with attractions for every type of person. And then everything slows down, way too fast.
Valley trails at UTSC on a snowy day. The walkways are maintained in the winter for students and community to enjoy nature. Photo By: (Vyusti Shroff//The Underground)
Fall comes around, and with it, more anxiety and the need to belong to somewhere — or someone — with the morals you cherish the most does too. As we give thanks and dress up for halloween, the city seems to get used to a new normal that includes pumpkin spice aroma and scarves that protects you from the first signs of the cold that is inevitable. Suddenly, going out seems like something for another season.
Maybe it’s time to watch some good old movies or read the book I bought five months ago and swore I would be done with it by now. The hour goes back and the daylight seems to be harder to find. With all of this, how can I not reconsider everything I’ve ever known, and change?
Then comes winter, and everything is intense again. Maybe it’s the Christmas decorations that bring some warmth to the cold days, or the pressure of a new year approaching that shows me that something needs to change. I find myself appreciating the cold because it gives the space I never thought I’d want just three months ago. But I trust that that is the normal cycle of life, and that there’s seasons for everything in life, including a season to reflect about everything I’ve experienced and be okay with it.
The long cold months go by, and suddenly the flowers are back and so is my energy. I am making plans for the summer like it is coming tomorrow, and I want to go out again, meet people, and maybe join a run club. Spring seems to bloom life again into our lives, but was that life ever really gone? Just because we are not living outside, doesn’t mean inside — literally and metaphorically —there wasn’t a whole lot of life going on.
After everything, I still find myself trying to put a new meaning to the seasons of my life. Accepting that everything has a beginning and an end is not easy, but it gets easier to see it in that way by understanding that everything around us follows that same season cycle. Just like flowers die, animals hibernate and hours go back, we might need to do that as well to understand who we are and who we want to be.
